Overcoming Self-Doubt as a Christian Woman in Midlife
Any one else out there struggle with a little self doubt? Whether you struggle with measuring up at work, as a parent, or even at church — the reality is that sometimes our self-doubts can keep us from experiencing the abundant life that Jesus promised us.
We just started our Summer Book Club (it’s not too late to join) and in her book, You Are the Girl For the Job — she reminds us that we need to speak truth and life over our self doubts. We need to walk in faith and believe that we are the girl for the job. And the bottom line is this…that voice of self-doubt? It's lying to you.
If you're a midlife woman trying to step into your calling, self-doubt can be one of the biggest obstacles to overcome. But the good news is, it can be overcome—with truth.
1. Name the Lie and Replace it With Truth
If you’ve been struggling with self-doubt, then it all starts with getting honest about what you’re saying to yourself. Self-doubt can lie to us about our abilities. Self-doubt can lie to us about our capabilities. Self-doubt can lie to us about God’s ability to work through us. So what’s the solution? Don't let unspoken lies drive your decisions. Call them out.
"We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." — 2 Corinthians 10:5
In coaching we call those little voices of self-doubt our inner critic. Your inner critic tells you things like “you’re not enough”, “you’re going to fail”, and “you don’t have what it takes”. When self-doubt or the inner critic starts to rear it’s ugly head, I guide my clients through a quick tool.
I ask them to take out a blank sheet of paper and draw what they think their inner critic looks like. Around your inner critic, draw some thought bubbles. Write down what the inner critic has said in those thought bubbles. Now step back and observe. Is it true? Is it what God says about you? I wrap it up by guiding the people I’m working with to find a Bible verse (what God says) that addresses these issues)
By getting real and specific about the lies of self-doubt that you are hearing, you can replace those lies with God’s truth and keep walking over your obstacles.
2. God Uses the Unqualified
Moses had a speech problem. Esther was scared. Still chosen.
"I will help you speak and will teach you what to say." — Exodus 4:12
All throughout Scripture, God calls real and broken people. People who wrestled with fear. People who made mistakes. People who didn’t get it right every time.
After He called them, He worked through them and used them. God isn’t looking for perfect. He’s looking for willing. Your self-doubt doesn’t disqualify you, it gives you an opportunity to show the world who God is.
3. Confidence Comes From Identity, Not Performance
Woof! If you’re anything like me, you identify more with performance and less in resting in your identity as a child of God. But confidence based on performance, succeeding, and getting things just right is fleeting. You don't have to hustle for your worth. You are already chosen, adopted, and called.
The secret to overcoming self-doubt is found in your relationship with God. Allowing Him to speak life over those places in your life you keep trying to hide. Allowing Him to love every part of you — even the parts that you’re low-key trying to fix before anyone notices. Allowing Him to declare your identity as a beloved child of God.
Confidence doesn't come from being fearless. It comes from knowing Whose you are.
Looking to overcome your self-doubt
In a world of quick fixes, we’re on a journey where God uses each step to transform our self-doubts to confident clarity. If you’re ready to face your self-doubts and questions, I have a free assessment and report to help you identify those area that need your attention.
